Pseudonym List

"Celebrating my 50th year in this Sordid Business 1973-2023"

Yes, Virginia, it's true: I've written under over fifty pen names. (Try saying that with soup in your mouth.)

Notes: Some guy in England tracked down my listing in the Internet Writers' Guide, and the next thing I know I'm looking up all the damned things, trying to piece together various and sundry (there has never been a master list -- I'm usually more concerned with keeping body & soul together to attempt to put together the Smithsonian Retrospective on the Various Misdeeds of Your Humble Correspondent.) But since he gets it, it doesn't seem fair not to let you see what strange Englishmen can manage to wheedle out of me. Doggoned politeness! Not used to it here in the States. What can I say?

Well, one thing. Sturgeon told me to never write anything that I was ashamed of, and it wouldn't ever come back to haunt me. "And it WILL," he said. "I promise you that." If I did that, he said, wise sage that he was, I would not be afraid to own up to anything I'd ever written. And I'm not. [Sadly, Ted is remembered, generally, ONLY as the "guy who wrote that episode of the original STAR TREK where Spock goes into heat!"  hw]

Please note: I didn't say I'd make it EASY for you.

• Hart Williams: WASHINGTON POST, KANSAS CITY STAR, etc. etc.
  (well, hell, it's my REAL damned name! At least it was when my father gave it to me. These others ... well, OK ....) and on lots of X-rated films. (See IMdB).

• Joseph Claussen: ADAM, CHOICE, HUSTLER, VELVET, LA Herald-Examiner, LA Times.  
  (And NEW WEST, LOS ANGELES MAGAZINE, A&M Records, UCLA, LOCUS, etc. My adopted name which I never liked but was stuck with for many years.)

• Preston Johns: ADAM, HORSE LAUGH, PLAYERS, etc.

• as Kimberly Carson (itself a pseudonym) REAL LETTERS 

• as Mistress Tantala (ditto) REAL LETTERS

• as Kristara Barrington (ditto) REAL LETTERS 

• as Lisa De Leeuw (ditto) REAL LETTERS 

• as Raven Touchstone (misattribution of rewriter for writer) "HOT MERCHANDISE", AVC, 1986 

• as Lee Quarnstrom (real writer, used his name, told me it was a "favor"), HUSTLER 

• Name Withheld ( I wrote under this one a LOT!) ADAM, HUSTLER, VELVET, OUI, REAL LETTERS, etc. 

• Anonymous (ditto) DITTO 

• Cynthia Piedmont (first byline), ADAM 

• Bronson Keyes, HORSE LAUGH, WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• Sean Thornton (art director, cf. "The Quiet Man" John Ford d.), HOT TIMES Wallace Wooley (cf. "I Married a Witch" st. Veronica Lake), HOT TIMES 

• Richard and Ilsa Blaine (cf. "Casablanca" and extrapolate), HOT TIMES 

• Arch Stanton (cf. "The Good, The Bad and the Ugly"), HOT TIMES 

• Christopher Coldwater (collaboration with Wm. Margold), "DIAL F FOR FANTASY" JVP, 1984 

• Sandra Botticcelli (sic), WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• Cindy and Tommy, ADAM, OUI 

• Randy Ooney (column parodied "60 Minutes", CBS, several), VIDEO X, ADULT CINEMA REVIEW 

• Harold Stophanes (humor; hint: say "Harry Stophanes" fast), ADAM, PLAYERS 

• Dr. Harold Stophanes, Phd. (sex column), ADAM 

• Clark Savage, III (cf. "Kenneth Robeson"s books), HOT TIMES 

• George Kaplan (cf. "North By Northwest", screenwriter: Ernest Lehman), HOT TIMES 

• Anthony Stark (cf. "Iron Man" Marvel Comics), HOT TIMES 

• Hart Weise (collaboration with Mark Weiss, last name is pub's typo), ADAM FILM WORLD 

• Helen Bed (inherited, and, I thought, a BAD idea), VIDEO X, ADULT CINEMA REVIEW 

• Sue Do Nim (honest!), WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• Lenny Wilde (ghostwriting under another writer's pseudonym), VIDEO X, ADULT CINEMA REVIEW 

• Snookums, HORSE LAUGH, WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• Dementia Praecox, ADAM FILM WORLD, HOT TIMES 

• Anne Igma, HORSE LAUGH, WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• Zeno, alt.sex.movies; Rec. Arts.Movies. Erotica [RAME]

• (Series of initials in Harold Stophanes' column: (ADAM) Mrs. S.H. Mr. A.N. Miss T.I. Mr. H. (spell them out. Sanskrit) 

• Vox Populi, HORSE LAUGH, WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• N. Onymous (Again, no kidding!), HORSE LAUGH, WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• Buxton Feeley, HORSE LAUGH, WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• Wayne Johnson, HORSE LAUGH, WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• Leila Preston: HUSTLER 

• Pox Americana, HORSE LAUGH, WEST CAFFEINE STREET 

• Mary Celeste, HORSE LAUGH, WEST CAFFEINE STREET, EAS NEWSLETTER 

• George Kaplan (a different George Kaplan), HOLLYWOOD VIDEO, 1985;  Shared credit: screenwriters on "ANGELS OF MERCY" 

• George Jacoby, wrong screenwriting credit, HARD TO SWALLOW (Paradise Visuals)

• Blind Lemon Birkenstock: Eugene Celebration advertised musician, Emerald City Bistro. 

• Blakely St. James for Berkley/Ace/Charter for CHRISTINA'S HIDEAWAY (#38) and CHRISTINA'S CRAVING (#49). 

• And, finally, "Ed Waldo" for the Los Angeles FREE PRESS. 

• I know that's only 46, but more as they come to mind... (and I've got more than 8 sockpuppets and other writing aliases I'm not willing to reveal here, just yet.)